3 years jail for a birthday party and 3 minutes of Twilight?

DAZMCFC · Post by **DAZMCFC** » Mon Dec 07, 2009 2:10 pm

neanderpaul14 wrote:
radiojake wrote:3 years jail for wanting to watch that movie seems apt to me....

This is America we're talking about, shouldn't she be put to death???

that seems a bit too harsh. just 10 years will do.

hahaha3hahaha · Post by **hahaha3hahaha** » Mon Dec 07, 2009 5:14 pm

-deleted-

72o · Post by **72o** » Mon Dec 07, 2009 5:45 pm

hahaha3hahaha wrote:Speaking of Twilight can someone tell me what happens in the end? I hope that pale-paced bitch and the two faggots are eaten alive by wolves. Or vampires. Although I think they are vampires. WTF?

This is my (probably partially or completely inaccurate) account of the nonsense I have been forced to pretend to listen to regarding this teeny-bopper garbage. My wife is for some stupid reason stuck on this crap like all of the sluts in college were about 90210 or Dawsons Creek or whatever. Before every post after this is, "Dood, you suck for knowing what happens in Twilight, you shouldn't admit that," I am aware that this does in fact suck and I should not admit it, but that's the beauty of the faceless interwebz. If you actually care about this stuff, please be aware I may spoil the ending for you. Or not, because I am probably wrong. Who knows.

The vampire dude doesn't want the human chick to become a vampire, because he's some sort of self-loathing wierdo. But the vampire royalty wanted to kill her because she knew about the vampires, so he had to promise the vampire royalty that he would turn her into a vampire so they wouldn't kill her.

The hot redhead vampire that wants to eat the human chick makes an army of vampires to come back and whoop some ass.

Meanwhile the vampire dude and the werewolf dude become friends. The werewolf dude doesn't get pissed about not getting to bang the human chick, even after she led him on and was a major cocktease, and then all of a sudden he found himself in the DFZ. Instead of going all wolfystyle on the vampire dude's azz, he gets his werewolf buddies and they help the good vampires defeat the hot redhead vampire and her army. Maybe he thinks that will help him get out of the DFZ, but he ends up staying there and she decides to bang the self-loathing vampire dude.

The vampire dude bangs the human chick, and gets her pregnant with a half-breed. The half-breed fetus almost kills her because it's draining her blood from the inside or some stupid shit, so then the vampire dude has to turn her into a vampire to prevent her from dying.

They find out that the human chick actually makes a pretty badass vampire, and she has some pretty cool force field super power.

The half-vampire half-human baby is born and it grows super fast. Somehow the vampire royalty people find out about it, and they think it's a child vampire, and turning children into vampires is against some sort of vampire law, so they get pissed off and try to regulate on the vampire crew. The good vampires get some of their peeps together to vouch for them, and there's a big mexican standoff-style confrontation where the ex-human chick uses her force field, and then the vampire royalty eventually back down and tell the vampires to bounce and they won't start busting shit up.

Then they all live happily ever after.

Woodruff · Post by **Woodruff** » Mon Dec 07, 2009 6:03 pm

72o wrote:I'm sure it was the latter.

Do you think the cops arrested her during the movie, or waited until she was walking out of the theater?

I'd be pissed if I paid 13 bucks for a movie (especially one this bad), only to have the entire thing interrupted by yapping inconsiderate asshats who then further interrupt the movie by getting arrested during it.

I don't know...I might enjoy the arresting portion of the display.

the.killing.44 · Post by **the.killing.44** » Mon Dec 07, 2009 6:11 pm

Okay, so you had to sit through it. New question:

YOU WERE AWAKE?!

MeDeFe · Post by **MeDeFe** » Mon Dec 07, 2009 7:02 pm

72o wrote:
hahaha3hahaha wrote:Speaking of Twilight can someone tell me what happens in the end? I hope that pale-paced bitch and the two faggots are eaten alive by wolves. Or vampires. Although I think they are vampires. WTF?
This is my (probably partially or completely inaccurate) account of the nonsense I have been forced to pretend to listen to regarding this teeny-bopper garbage. My wife is for some stupid reason stuck on this crap like all of the sluts in college were about 90210 or Dawsons Creek or whatever. Before every post after this is, "Dood, you suck for knowing what happens in Twilight, you shouldn't admit that," I am aware that this does in fact suck and I should not admit it, but that's the beauty of the faceless interwebz. If you actually care about this stuff, please be aware I may spoil the ending for you. Or not, because I am probably wrong. Who knows.

The vampire dude doesn't want the human chick to become a vampire, because he's some sort of self-loathing wierdo. But the vampire royalty wanted to kill her because she knew about the vampires, so he had to promise the vampire royalty that he would turn her into a vampire so they wouldn't kill her.

The hot redhead vampire that wants to eat the human chick makes an army of vampires to come back and whoop some ass.

Meanwhile the vampire dude and the werewolf dude become friends. The werewolf dude doesn't get pissed about not getting to bang the human chick, even after she led him on and was a major cocktease, and then all of a sudden he found himself in the DFZ. Instead of going all wolfystyle on the vampire dude's azz, he gets his werewolf buddies and they help the good vampires defeat the hot redhead vampire and her army. Maybe he thinks that will help him get out of the DFZ, but he ends up staying there and she decides to bang the self-loathing vampire dude.

The vampire dude bangs the human chick, and gets her pregnant with a half-breed. The half-breed fetus almost kills her because it's draining her blood from the inside or some stupid shit, so then the vampire dude has to turn her into a vampire to prevent her from dying.

They find out that the human chick actually makes a pretty badass vampire, and she has some pretty cool force field super power.

The half-vampire half-human baby is born and it grows super fast. Somehow the vampire royalty people find out about it, and they think it's a child vampire, and turning children into vampires is against some sort of vampire law, so they get pissed off and try to regulate on the vampire crew. The good vampires get some of their peeps together to vouch for them, and there's a big mexican standoff-style confrontation where the ex-human chick uses her force field, and then the vampire royalty eventually back down and tell the vampires to bounce and they won't start busting shit up.

Then they all live happily ever after.

When you put it like that you make it sound good.

72o · Post by **72o** » Tue Dec 08, 2009 10:21 am

MeDeFe wrote:
72o wrote:
hahaha3hahaha wrote:Speaking of Twilight can someone tell me what happens in the end? I hope that pale-paced bitch and the two faggots are eaten alive by wolves. Or vampires. Although I think they are vampires. WTF?
This is my (probably partially or completely inaccurate) account of the nonsense I have been forced to pretend to listen to regarding this teeny-bopper garbage. My wife is for some stupid reason stuck on this crap like all of the sluts in college were about 90210 or Dawsons Creek or whatever. Before every post after this is, "Dood, you suck for knowing what happens in Twilight, you shouldn't admit that," I am aware that this does in fact suck and I should not admit it, but that's the beauty of the faceless interwebz. If you actually care about this stuff, please be aware I may spoil the ending for you. Or not, because I am probably wrong. Who knows.

The vampire dude doesn't want the human chick to become a vampire, because he's some sort of self-loathing wierdo. But the vampire royalty wanted to kill her because she knew about the vampires, so he had to promise the vampire royalty that he would turn her into a vampire so they wouldn't kill her.

The hot redhead vampire that wants to eat the human chick makes an army of vampires to come back and whoop some ass.

Meanwhile the vampire dude and the werewolf dude become friends. The werewolf dude doesn't get pissed about not getting to bang the human chick, even after she led him on and was a major cocktease, and then all of a sudden he found himself in the DFZ. Instead of going all wolfystyle on the vampire dude's azz, he gets his werewolf buddies and they help the good vampires defeat the hot redhead vampire and her army. Maybe he thinks that will help him get out of the DFZ, but he ends up staying there and she decides to bang the self-loathing vampire dude.

The vampire dude bangs the human chick, and gets her pregnant with a half-breed. The half-breed fetus almost kills her because it's draining her blood from the inside or some stupid shit, so then the vampire dude has to turn her into a vampire to prevent her from dying.

They find out that the human chick actually makes a pretty badass vampire, and she has some pretty cool force field super power.

The half-vampire half-human baby is born and it grows super fast. Somehow the vampire royalty people find out about it, and they think it's a child vampire, and turning children into vampires is against some sort of vampire law, so they get pissed off and try to regulate on the vampire crew. The good vampires get some of their peeps together to vouch for them, and there's a big mexican standoff-style confrontation where the ex-human chick uses her force field, and then the vampire royalty eventually back down and tell the vampires to bounce and they won't start busting shit up.

Then they all live happily ever after.
When you put it like that you make it sound good.

Yeah, but it's really not. As if you needed clarification of that fact.

oVo · Post by **oVo** » Wed Dec 09, 2009 11:11 am

In support of a boycott I'm never going to that theatre and after that revue
will also boycott all venues that show Twilight.

hahaha3hahaha · Post by **hahaha3hahaha** » Wed Dec 09, 2009 3:49 pm

-deleted-

72o · Post by **72o** » Thu Dec 10, 2009 5:36 pm

The lolcat versions are pretty good.

http://microsuede.blogspot.com/2008/11/ ... 806f7caaab

http://microsuede.blogspot.com/2009/11/ ... -moon.html

MeDeFe · Post by **MeDeFe** » Sun Jul 04, 2010 8:37 am

New shit has come to light. The woman is filing a civil suit, seeking 50,000$ in damages, claiming emotional distress and, more importantly, malicious prosecution. Details vary slightly between different news sources, but I'd love to see this backfire for the movie industry.

Did you know employees at movie theatres get 500$ every time they catch someone filming the movie?

http://www.afterdawn.com/news/article.c ... ie_theater

http://www.wired.com/threatlevel/2010/0 ... g-theater/

Maugena · Post by **Maugena** » Sun Jul 04, 2010 4:55 pm

MeDeFe wrote:New shit has come to light. The woman is filing a civil suit, seeking 50,000$ in damages, claiming emotional distress and, more importantly, malicious prosecution. Details vary slightly between different news sources, but I'd love to see this backfire for the movie industry.

Did you know employees at movie theatres get 500$ every time they catch someone filming the movie?

http://www.afterdawn.com/news/article.c ... ie_theater

http://www.wired.com/threatlevel/2010/0 ... g-theater/

I never heard about this in the first place.
But damn...
On a side note, I really disliked the way the article was written. (From the original post.)

ljex · Post by **ljex** » Mon Jul 05, 2010 3:05 am

MeDeFe wrote:New shit has come to light. The woman is filing a civil suit, seeking 50,000$ in damages, claiming emotional distress and, more importantly, malicious prosecution. Details vary slightly between different news sources, but I'd love to see this backfire for the movie industry.

Did you know employees at movie theatres get 500$ every time they catch someone filming the movie?

I work at a movie theatre, so yes.

thegreekdog · Post by **thegreekdog** » Tue Jul 06, 2010 5:55 pm

I think it's more disturbing that this woman is 22 years old. I understand how this sort of movie can be desirable to watch if you're a 13 year old girl. But 22? C'mon! Get a life. Get a job.

BigBallinStalin · Post by **BigBallinStalin** » Tue Jul 06, 2010 11:51 pm

Get a job, god damnit. Get out there and make money, you worthless consumer sack of shit.

CONSUME, CONSUME!! THE POWER OF CHRIST CONSUMES YOU!

InkL0sed · Post by **InkL0sed** » Wed Jul 07, 2010 12:23 am

thegreekdog wrote:I think it's more disturbing that this woman is 22 years old. I understand how this sort of movie can be desirable to watch if you're a 13 year old girl. But 22? C'mon! Get a life. Get a job.

Yeah, she should be a bootlegger.