Apologies if this has already been discussed, but the text in the upper left hand corner (the "adapted fictional" bit) is pretty underwhelming. It seems to go out of its way to qualify the map. But the map itself is basically "the castle", so it's not referring to any place/event in particular. I realize that the concept is based on "where eagles dare", but it seems that everything has been fictionalized to the point where you don't need to have a full-throttle qualifier in the legend.
So why not something more aggressive and risk-ish, like "You are part of an elite paratrooper unit deep behind enemy lines. Storm Das Schloss and escape at the airport. The enemy will try and stop you!"
THOTA: dingdingdingdingdingdingBOOM
Te Occidere Possunt Sed Te Edere Non Possunt Nefas Est
Incandenza wrote:Apologies if this has already been discussed, but the text in the upper left hand corner (the "adapted fictional" bit) is pretty underwhelming. It seems to go out of its way to qualify the map. But the map itself is basically "the castle", so it's not referring to any place/event in particular. I realize that the concept is based on "where eagles dare", but it seems that everything has been fictionalized to the point where you don't need to have a full-throttle qualifier in the legend.
So why not something more aggressive and risk-ish, like "You are part of an elite paratrooper unit deep behind enemy lines. Storm Das Schloss and escape at the airport. The enemy will try and stop you!"
Mmmmm....that's ok up to beginning on the starting points in the lower left, Incandenza, but everyone is also playing the part of the german enemy in Der Stadt and Der Flughafen, so your storyline doens't kind of make sense. Sorry. But if come up with something better i'll definitely consider placement, if i don't think of something myself. Thanks for the suggestion.
* Pearl Harbour * Waterloo * Forbidden City * Jamaica * Pot Mosbi
---Das Schloß has reached the ‘Final Forge’ Stage. I've revived this thread from the pits of the Foundry Furnace (okay, maybe not) and have examined the contents. Nearly every major concern has been addressed. If there are any other current concerns, please make your voice heard. If after a reasonable amount of time there has not been any objection or protest, the map will be deemed finished with the 'Foundry Brand' of approval and will be submitted for live play. As long as there is still discussion or posts that have yet to be commented on, the map will remain in Final Forge until said discussion has reached the conclusion that the map has reached its final and polished version.
sweet I have been watching this one travel through the forges and now It's one final step away. I have nothing very constructive to say except that it looks great and I am very excited
Incandenza:
Apologies if this has already been discussed, but the text in the upper left hand corner (the "adapted fictional" bit) is pretty underwhelming. It seems to go out of its way to qualify the map. But the map itself is basically "the castle", so it's not referring to any place/event in particular. I realize that the concept is based on "where eagles dare", but it seems that everything has been fictionalized to the point where you don't need to have a full-throttle qualifier in the legend.
So why not something more aggressive and risk-ish, like "You are part of an elite paratrooper unit deep behind enemy lines. Storm Das Schloss and escape at the airport. The enemy will try and stop you!"
cairnswk:
Mmmmm....that's ok up to beginning on the starting points in the lower left, Incandenza, but everyone is also playing the part of the german enemy in Der Stadt and Der Flughafen, so your storyline doens't kind of make sense. Sorry. But if come up with something better i'll definitely consider placement, if i don't think of something myself. Thanks for the suggestion. :)
Back to Incandenza:
But the existing text already implies an Allied perspective:
"An adapted fictional story from WWII to storm Das Shloss and escape at the airport. The enemy will try and stop you!"
The "adapted fictional story" is one of storming and escaping, with no mention of the german perspective of defending and preventing/containing. Plus, the enemy will try to stop "you". And not to put too fine a point on it, but the first sentence is a grammatic shambles no matter what the subtext (I have english teachers waking up in various cold sweats at the thought of someone using an infinitive like that), and as such needs needs a rewrite whether or not my other arguments take hold.
Another thing to consider is that the map itself presupposed an Allied perspective. :::edit - I did not realize that the german troops had names::: The win condition is an Allied one. And the fact that players control both Allies and Germans can be abstracted satisfactorily without losing the essential Allies slant of the map.
I know I'm being anal (which is very much in character).
Oh, and congrats on the ff!
(btw, O powers that be, this 'no bbcode in ff threads' sucks. I'm sure it's been said, just adding my voice to the chorus)
Last edited by Incandenza on Tue Apr 08, 2008 4:07 am, edited 1 time in total.
[quote="Incandenza"]....
I know I'm being anal (which is very much in character).
Oh, and congrats on the ff!
(btw, O powers that be, this 'no bbcode in ff threads' sucks. I'm sure it's been said, just adding my voice to the chorus)[/quote]
Thanks for ff!!
Are you anal...i hadn't noticed! :-) Ask my work mates about my begin anal. i bet we'd make a good pair...when the mood suites me.
Seriously though, i have read your reply and understand exactly what you are saying.
My perspective though is that this has to apply eqally across the board to every player.
That's why i have "bland/non-descript" introduction leading into what has to occur for gameplay.
To me the paratroopers are self-evident on the map....so i would like to see something different if you're up to it.
bryguy wrote:congrats! btw u know bbcode is off right?
yes bryguy....we know. thanks
Natewolfman wrote:wow nice one, i didnt even see it in the foundry discussion/ideas i am instantly drawn to the look of this one, very nice, keep up the good work!
yes i'm quite proud of this one....some good pushing me along from the foundry.
you'll have to visit the foundry more often...you're always welcome you know
* Pearl Harbour * Waterloo * Forbidden City * Jamaica * Pot Mosbi
1)not major at all, but the whole bottom left corner has a feeling off... blurring? alot of the map is sharp and clean but that corner just feels alittle blured, maybe its ment to be that way but just a thought
2) possibly even less major but around your P1 spot the technicolor looks like it suddenly cuts off, just a very sharp end, not rounded or anything almost like you ran out of paper to draw on
1)not major at all, but the whole bottom left corner has a feeling off... blurring? alot of the map is sharp and clean but that corner just feels alittle blured, maybe its ment to be that way but just a thought
yes this is meant to be that way....obviously very snowed in landscape in the hills
2) possibly even less major but around your P1 spot the technicolor looks like it suddenly cuts off, just a very sharp end, not rounded or anything almost like you ran out of paper to draw on
This one i'll look into.
EDIT\\\\This too is simply the artistry i create in making this snow scene. I'm not worried by it at all and would prefer to leave as is.
Last edited by cairnswk on Sun Apr 13, 2008 9:04 am, edited 1 time in total.
* Pearl Harbour * Waterloo * Forbidden City * Jamaica * Pot Mosbi
1)not major at all, but the whole bottom left corner has a feeling off... blurring? alot of the map is sharp and clean but that corner just feels alittle blured, maybe its ment to be that way but just a thought
yes this is meant to be that way....obviously very snowed in landscape in the hills
figured it might be, but decided it didnt hurt to mention
you can hardly see the ends/start of the arrows that have are pointing at/from Das Shlob
bryguy, if you can mention them and tell which direction they point in, which i assume you can from the note of your comment, i would say that you can see them adequately enough. Remember this is a snow scene and things are meant to be a little hazy is snow conditions, yes?
* Pearl Harbour * Waterloo * Forbidden City * Jamaica * Pot Mosbi
you can hardly see the ends/start of the arrows that have are pointing at/from Das Shlob
bryguy, if you can mention them and tell which direction they point in, which i assume you can from the note of your comment, i would say that you can see them adequately enough. Remember this is a snow scene and things are meant to be a little hazy is snow conditions, yes?
its easy to tell which direction they point in cause they're between the lift cars and kontrol 2/3, and im just saying that its a little hard to see, just thought i would mention it
you can hardly see the ends/start of the arrows that have are pointing at/from Das Shlob
bryguy, if you can mention them and tell which direction they point in, which i assume you can from the note of your comment, i would say that you can see them adequately enough. Remember this is a snow scene and things are meant to be a little hazy is snow conditions, yes?
its easy to tell which direction they point in cause they're between the lift cars and kontrol 2/3, and im just saying that its a little hard to see, just thought i would mention it
i did take note of it....i am working on the xml as we correspond, and if you refresh your browser you'll see it has been adjusted on the small version to start, coz that's what i am working on.
* Pearl Harbour * Waterloo * Forbidden City * Jamaica * Pot Mosbi
i am instantly drawn to the look of this one, very nice, keep up the good work!
