A Girl Dilemma

[ParadiceCity9]

ehh..she said that she's goin to the football game on friday then is in Georgetown on saturday and needs time for homework..
so I was like 'ah ok, maybe another time then (: (I do that a lot when i'm texting girls, use emoticons. it's ok, because it's only to girls)
speaking of homework i have to finish mine...ttyl'

that ok?

[jnd94]

I'm tellin you, go for your gut reaction. You don't need our opinions.

Lol the thing is, my gut reaction with the ladies isn't always the best.

You say that you think that "claire" is special. I can understand that you may not want to f*ck it up with her by saying something stupid, but if you feel that way, you should go with what you think, no matter how stupid it may sound to you.

[jonesthecurl]

Me again with serious advice.

If you both like golf (or indeed anything) text to say - hey, I'm gonna play golf at [her local golf course] sometime in the next few weeks, I wondered if you'd like to play too?

Leaves room for yes, no, maybe another time - and you shouldbe able to work out from the response how eager she is to see you, and maybe whether there's any possibilty of romance.

Oh, and for some of you other guys. NO, "romance" and "can I bone her" are not interchangeable.

[ParadiceCity9]

ehh..she said that she's goin to the football game on friday then is in Georgetown on saturday and needs time for homework..
so I was like 'ah ok, maybe another time then (: (I do that a lot when i'm texting girls, use emoticons. it's ok, because it's only to girls)
speaking of homework i have to finish mine...ttyl'

that ok?

...

[FabledIntegral]

Never start a text message with hey... girls usually think "what's the reason for this text." different than AIM.

In short - sounds to me like she was interested for a bit - but the fact that she stopped going on AIM and shit usually signifies something.

most boring girl i ever dated (she was really hot though, so it's my excuse, actually ONE of the hottest I've ever dated, she was just really REALLY boring) used to text me nonstop. I was dating another girl at the same time (never said with either of them we were going exclusively, so no, I'm not a dick) and they both used texting nonstop. I used to only get 500 texts per month - and that was fine, I wasn't a huge texter, using prob 350 per month, which is a little over 10 per day. All of a sudden I skyrocketed to 950 one month ($45 texing fees ...) ... anyways... point being... once the boring one got over me (well I got over her too simply because she was BORING)... she literally cut it off by just stopping sending me texts (as I never had to initiate them too often because she was sending so friggin' many to me). Stopped going on AIM much - didn't pick up her phone a few times. I got the hint.. wasn't really a big deal... all the damn bitch ever did was smoke out every single day of the week...

Point is - if she was interested in you she would have kept up contact and put in the effort. At this point, it's probably too late or she would have pursued it. I don't see any problem with getting in the friend zone... one girl I initially wanted to go out with ended up not being interested... I became friends with her, she's one of my best friends now and we've even shared a drunken hook up about a year and a half after I stopped trying to get with her... friend zone isn't a big deal, you can still gain a friend from it, and try to get to know her and pounce on a situation if she breaks up with any potential bf. Seen it happen a lot.

[jonesthecurl]

ehh..she said that she's goin to the football game on friday then is in Georgetown on saturday and needs time for homework..
so I was like 'ah ok, maybe another time then (: (I do that a lot when i'm texting girls, use emoticons. it's ok, because it's only to girls)
speaking of homework i have to finish mine...ttyl'

that ok?

OK - she knows you're interested at least in hanging out, next move (if any) is up to her.

[heavycola]

so WHAT HAPPENED? This thread is like being stuck in the circle of hell where they make you watch endless episodes of Dawsons Creek.

Dude - just do what Jones says. It's a rule I am sure most of us on here live by.

[gdeangel]

As anyone here knows, I read the forums here way to much, but Christ man, give a gut at least 24-hrs to get back on the ball.

Here's how I think you get the perfect diaglogue going:

U: Hey
Her: Hey
<<random discussion>>
<<conversation winding down>>
U: BTW, I'm was going to hit at Reston on Saturday, but I've got nobody to play with. You still golf?
Her: <<doesn't matter what she says>>
U: Why don't you come out and hit some balls with me <<(classic double entendre)>>
U: <<something dorky like:>> uhhh... that didn't quite come out right!
Her: <<disarmed by the dorky edge>> Sure, Great.

If she says she's busy, just drop it. If she wants to do it another time, she'll make the move and initiate.

Definitely don't use the "just me and you part" - you are in an unenviable position here of being a third wheel. You don't want to end up like Rusty Monkey!

....

Uhhh, read the rest of it... yeah I agree with Ingetral nearly 100%... it would have been better to do by chat, or, even better, by phone. Texting is pretty hard to read what's going on. And if she's picking homework over you, that's a pretty clear sign your chances that she's interested are <5%, and even if she did long distance is going to be a bitch anyway to pull off. My advice - let her go man. But if you want to pursue anything more you're going to have to be psycho circumspect about it. Like just "bump into her" somewhere random where you actually would normally be. Do you have any mutual friends? Does your school have any more games against her school? If so, then you should go with some friends...

Or, if you want to pull out all the stops, then you could get a really hot chick to go with you (if you don't know any, maybe there are some "adult dance" establishments or "escorts" near you??? get a young looking chick who can pass for 18 or it won't work... and tell make sure she knows you're going to a high school sports match/party and not S&M in your basement so she's got to dress the part... a little cleavage is all that's needed, maybe a little peak of a handlebar tatoo - but no beaver !! and, BTW, it's probably going to cost you a couple hundred ). If anyone asks, just say you met her on a gaming site (absolutely never let anyone know she's getting paid!!). You and your companion need to both sit down close / next to Claire and Mr. Jock strap, and have your slutty chick be all flirty with Mr. Jock Strap. Afterward, you'll know pretty fast whether you have any chance in hell with Claire. Obviously there needs to be some set up (text or otherwise) to make sure Claire will be there with Jock Strap, so we're talking a significant amount of con and recon.

Again, if it were me I'd just move on!

[ParadiceCity9]

Lol that's quite the complicated scheme there gdeangal...
But ya I agree with what you guys are saying...this usually happens to me. I see her, or any other girl I've been with, for the first time in a while and I get all worked up about it and feel like we should get back together...just a cycle
So I actually didn't remember anything Claire-related all day at school today, so obviously, she's not that much of a big deal to me.

Thanks guys!

[TheSupremeCourt]

So she... stopped going on MSN, you saw her with another guy, and she just said no because she's "got to do her homework"?

Desperate times call for desperate measures. You already know she likes golf. Burst into her house (naked, with Tiger Woods painted on your chest) and sing the closing song from "Phantom of the Opera". If you don't know that, then Happy Birthday will do. If she's still there, declare your undying love and throw a ring at her face.

[Mjinga]

I'm not meaning to put a damper on things, but I've seen a plethora of young boys your age go through this same thing. There are three things you need to realise:

1) You may think this is something special. It isn't. It's your hormones.
2) The only thing shallower than a beautiful high school-age girl is the meniscus on a .25mL graduated cylinder.
3) You're passing the buck here. This entire topic is a way to say to yourself, "It wasn't my fault, I was following X's advice!" if things go sour.

Man up. Make your own decisions. You can't be frantically asking online people, "What should I dooooo!?" while you're with her, can you?

[pimpdave]

Make her a mix tape with the Police song "So Lonely".

Then play it in the car while you're driving her somewhere, and just play it as if it just came on all of a sudden. And then look over at her meaningfully whenever Sting is crooning, cocking your eyebrow occasionally. Then when Sting starting doing that muppet-scream yelling "So Lonely!" you sing along too.

She will melt for your comedy. But she'll only think it's funny if you do it as if you're being completely seriously. When she starts laughing, you start laughing. Then ask her if she's wants the adrenaline rush of her life. When she looks confused and says "What?", just crash the car immediately. Her adrenaline will go through the roof, so will yours. Get naked with her in a fit of passion, and let nature take it's course.

[jonesthecurl]

So she... stopped going on MSN, you saw her with another guy, and she just said no because she's "got to do her homework"?

Desperate times call for desperate measures. You already know she likes golf. Burst into her house (naked, with Tiger Woods painted on your chest) and sing the closing song from "Phantom of the Opera". If you don't know that, then Happy Birthday will do. If she's still there, declare your undying love and throw a ring at her face.

Actually you should be naked except for a pair of socks and some wooden clogs.
Afeter the song, and a cute little clog-dance, you say " Now do yah think I'm sexy?". Works every time.