the longest thread, thread - Occasionally NSFW

[autoload]

I'm out.

[strike wolf]

I've been hiding from the scary white stuff falling from the sky...SAVE ME JIMBO!

Auto, would you please stop jerking off? You've even managed to frighten Strike now.

Now I'm scared again...

[strike wolf]

Copy past joke will have to hold you over until the real thing comes back.

Why men don't write advice colums.

Dear Walter,


I hope you can help me here. The other day, I set off for work leaving my husband in the house watching the TV as usual. I hadn't driven more than a mile down the road when the engine conked out and the car shuddered to a halt. I walked back home to get my husband's help.

When I got home I couldn't believe my eyes. He was in our bedroom with the neighbours daughter. I am 32, my husband is 34, and the neighbours daughter is 22. We have been married for ten years. When I confronted him, he broke down and admitted that they had been having an affair for the past
six months.

I told him to stop or I would leave him. He was sacked from his job six months ago and he says he has been feeling increasingly depressed and worthless. I love him very much, but ever since I gave him the ultimatum he has become increasingly distant. He won't go to counselling and I'm afraid I can't get through to him anymore.

Can you please help?

Sincerely, Sheila

-------------------------------


Dear Sheila:

A car stalling after being driven a short distance can be caused by a variety of faults with the engine. Start by checking that there is no dirt in the fuel line. If it is clear, check the vacuum pipes and hoses on the intake manifold and also check all grounding wires. If none of these approaches solves the problem, it could be that the fuel pump itself is faulty, causing low delivery pressure to the injectors.

I hope this helps.

Everyone knows that is was an innuendo dealing with the fact that she doesn't take care of herself enough to keep him interested.

[targetman377]

not far - the Mrs commutes every day.

really she works in new york city dam how bad is the traffic she sits in?

[targetman377]

Went to the eye doctor. Lasik recommended. Eyes dilationized. Sitting downstairs wearing some cheap sunglasses. Oh yeah.

Terminator sunglasses?

Yep. After all before Arnie, I was the original time traveling assassin.

what hahahaha i thought you everything you knew it was my idea i am the original stop stealing my ideas

Technically I'm the first because I went back in time all the way back to when the first bacteria was and assassinated it...As for how we are all here now? It had already divided by the time I got to it...

you claim you are cause you did that but i tought you everthing you knew i taught you how to do it oh brother

[targetman377]

**Munches on a banana**


--Andy

munches on an apple after all an apple keeps the doctor away what dose a banana do?

Unlike the apple when you throw the banana at the doctor it goes splat and is funnier. plus all the peels make it impossible for someone to sneak up on you.

how does that keep a doctor away?

[targetman377]

I've been hiding from the scary white stuff falling from the sky...SAVE ME JIMBO!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7EOKx6WMEEk

SNAP OUT OF IT MAN ITS JUST SNOW!!!!!

[targetman377]

Sometimes it comes in a yellow variant...

Only when the huskies have passed.

or

watch this
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=edFZhMjdZww

[targetman377]

Where is targetman? We need a good laugh in here.

present

[targetman377]

sorry i was at the gf's where i then proseded to go to a friends house last night all night now i am final on i hope you can forgive me

[strike wolf]

not far - the Mrs commutes every day.

really she works in new york city dam how bad is the traffic she sits in?

as bad as your spelling.

[strike wolf]

Terminator sunglasses?

Yep. After all before Arnie, I was the original time traveling assassin.

what hahahaha i thought you everything you knew it was my idea i am the original stop stealing my ideas

Technically I'm the first because I went back in time all the way back to when the first bacteria was and assassinated it...As for how we are all here now? It had already divided by the time I got to it...

you claim you are cause you did that but i tought you everthing you knew i taught you how to do it oh brother

Giving me a quick reminder by trying to shoot me...doesn't count as teaching me.

[strike wolf]

**Munches on a banana**


--Andy

munches on an apple after all an apple keeps the doctor away what dose a banana do?

Unlike the apple when you throw the banana at the doctor it goes splat and is funnier. plus all the peels make it impossible for someone to sneak up on you.

how does that keep a doctor away?

Theoretically they are blinded and can't find you for a while.

[Quirk]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LRaH1GGW6Tg

[Army of GOD]

I just want everyone to know, I changed my mouse to a Magnum and my loading pointer to a Koopa Troopa. It's pretty sweet.

[jonesthecurl]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LRaH1GGW6Tg

Absolutely beautiful stuff.

And every time that you realise you've completely run out of energy, you can see exactly where it's been syphoned off to.

[jonesthecurl]

not far - the Mrs commutes every day.

really she works in new york city dam how bad is the traffic she sits in?

Ho, no. We picked a town with trains. Only cab drivers, stuntmen and the insane drive in NYC. If there's a difference between those three categotries anyway.

incidentally, a fine party. the apartment was on the 20-something floor with an incredible view over the Hudson. The hosts were Hindus from India, and the food was very nostalgic for a brit curryholic like me. I met a guy (also a brit, also 50% Welsh) who shared my first name - and we got on v well. He is loads younger than me, and only got married two weeks ago, to a local, also very nice.

The party was a real cultural and ethic mishmash, since the common factor is that they all work for a multinational company. Very interesting, very enjoyable.

I took big box of the famous Jonesthecurl choccies with me, and there has been much buzz about them since.

[strike wolf]

I've been hiding from the scary white stuff falling from the sky...SAVE ME JIMBO!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7EOKx6WMEEk

SNAP OUT OF IT MAN ITS JUST SNOW!!!!!

That is a good practical joke.

[strike wolf]

Sometimes it comes in a yellow variant...

Only when the huskies have passed.

or

watch this
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=edFZhMjdZww

Miller Lite? Might as well be dog piss.

[strike wolf]

I just want everyone to know, I changed my mouse to a Magnum and my loading pointer to a Koopa Troopa. It's pretty sweet.

that works for about 2 seconds than when you go to click the Age verification. You shoot your load right through the screen...

[muy_thaiguy]

I just want everyone to know, I changed my mouse to a Magnum and my loading pointer to a Koopa Troopa. It's pretty sweet.

that works for about 2 seconds than when you go to click the Age verification. You shoot your load right through the screen...

Should I or shouldn't I?

[jonesthecurl]

Sometimes it comes in a yellow variant...

Only when the huskies have passed.

or

watch this
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=edFZhMjdZww

Miller Lite? Might as well be dog piss.

The other week Mrs curl bought some Miller 64, by accident. That's worse than the "Lite". I'd think I'd rather drink the huskie wee-wee.
(And it's blinded,me, temporarily)*


*(Zappa reference)

[2dimes]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LRaH1GGW6Tg

Absolutely beautiful stuff.

And every time that you realise you've completely run out of energy, you can see exactly where it's been syphoned off to.

If my 3 year old had an account he would have rated it 5 stars. "Ha ha, that's funny. I want to watch that more."

[autoload]

I've been hiding from the scary white stuff falling from the sky...SAVE ME JIMBO!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7EOKx6WMEEk

SNAP OUT OF IT MAN ITS JUST SNOW!!!!!

Fake.

[autoload]

Where is targetman? We need a good laugh in here.

present

Too late.