The Spanking Monkeys [Selective Recruiting]

[laughingcavalier]

Night-times when we gather in the trees and the old monkeys tell us stories there is one tale that always begins.

In that place which resides beyond the realms of comprehension; where logic battles emotion to create the perfect thought.
In that place where wonder smiles as she sits on the sands of perpetuity, swaying in the wind as the ocean whispers hidden truth.
In that place the tide is turning; the waves have sought new crests, leaving listless foam where white hooves once crashed.

So strain your eye against the faltering light... guard your gaze lest the sea-sprays impair! Move a little closer.. can you see that ghostly shape.. the shape was always there, just hidden by your primal fear.

With wizened face and pensive pose, his smile for warmth, deep thought his clothes. He sits and sees all things of worth; the battles won and victories' mirth.

His aim is mischief, conquest his role! His actions gilt-edged by comforts soul!
For he is legion, a family of one.
For he is Monkey, let us have some fun!

Our myths come out of the mists of time, and snake their tendrils right down to today. We got our revenge on THOTA at last so we don't have a grudge to bear any more. We're playing the finals in the Conqueror's Cup. Some say we're eternal seconds; monkis know there is no-one better to team with for a game of old-fashioned risk. We have no leaders, we are all leaders.

We'll probably never get round to recruiting much because that would mean someone doing some work which isn't really our style. But the word in the tree is we'd like a few baby new monkis - exceptional players with some ambition - & a mad streak a mile wide won't hurt.


These are the monkis as of February 2014:

Spoiler

Active (In spirit if not in war):

larsin
luckywar
kratos644
skillfull
Sam02
laughingcavalier
ender_w99
Nate the Great
codeblue1018
osujacket
friendly1
hatchman
Blind Date
dustin800
Junior Bee
RiskTycoon
Vuk Samotnjak
Bonomo101
jiminski
Firstholliday



Non-Active ghost Monkis
Jonsvoll
Frop
Sir Titus
Surfingmace
SkyT
Firstholliday
Georgerx7di
Tisha
kmacready
laddida
Ruben Cassar
jalen45

Here are some stories we told before, mostly still true:

Spoiler

We are anarchy.
We have a Queen and she is beautiful.
We do strategy.
We are older than the hills.
We are the clan that beat TOFU.
We have unfinished business.
We come from all over.
We go places.
We spend the summer on the beach.
We are monki.

You are a good team player, or a great team player, or on your way to becoming one.
There is nothing ordinary about you.

Post here, or PM any of the active monkis.

If you're a fine player and want to find out about life in the jungle, let us know.

[sam02]

i spend all year on the beach.

[firstholliday]

eheheh nice job LC

[skillfull]

I looooooooooooooooooooooooooooove the summer

[Gold Knight]

i spend all year on the beach.

Sam is taking over Tom Hanks' role is "Castaway 2". LC can be Wilson the Volleyball.

[Dako]

Dang, the TOFU mention :D

[laughingcavalier]

Dang, the TOFU mention

LOL - a monki who is older and wiser than me said we shouldn't put it in but I thought it was kind of topical.

[skillfull]

Dang, the TOFU mention

LOL - a monki who is older and wiser than me said we shouldn't put it in but I thought it was kind of topical.

I am not older than you LC!

[laughingcavalier]

Dang, the TOFU mention

LOL - a monki who is older and wiser than me said we shouldn't put it in but I thought it was kind of topical.

I am not older than you LC!

Well you're not wiser than me either but I had to say something nice about you.

[Georgerx7di]

Dang, the TOFU mention

LOL - a monki who is older and wiser than me said we shouldn't put it in but I thought it was kind of topical.

I am not older than you LC!

Well you're not wiser than me either but I had to say something nice about you.

Lmao

[skillfull]

Dang, the TOFU mention

LOL - a monki who is older and wiser than me said we shouldn't put it in but I thought it was kind of topical.

I am not older than you LC!

Well you're not wiser than me either but I had to say something nice about you.

Lmao

You could have just said that i am single and I look like Johnny Depp,and then added my address in the end
Come on Girls....

[Gold Knight]

You could have just said that i am single and I look like Johnny Depp,and then added my address in the end
Come on Girls....

"Hey ladies, hop in my van: I got candy..."

[Goatboy]

I spend my summers at metal festivals and dodging fires and floods in Australia...I live in the murder capital of Australia.. Adelaide!..(30kms from Snowtown u know about Snowtown right?)...Bill Hicks is the god father of comedy, and the god father is now dead...goat wants to play with the monkeys!

[laughingcavalier]

Welcome Araldite and goatboy to our training group The Spankademy.
Still looking for a couple of topflight proven team players.

[Georgerx7di]

Dang, the TOFU mention

I heard that this dako guy ^^ is an alright player, should we consider him for tsm?

[killercheez]

can i join

[nicarus]

i would like to be considered for enrolement in to the spankademy.

[killboy108]

How do you guys review players to check if they're ok to join your clan or not?

[owenshooter]

is this a new thread? or have you just recently started openly recruiting? just wondering...-0

[laughingcavalier]

is this a new thread? or have you just recently started openly recruiting? just wondering...-0

Yes. Or no. Or yes and no. Depends what you mean. When you have got back from your vacation for trolling you can explain what you mean.

Thanks to all for the responses we've had so far. With the addition of Nate the Great and codeblue1018 we are up to full strength. The tree is positively groaning under the weight of monkis, and that is not even counting the weight of the giant banana clapper just gave to firsty.

So we are no longer actively looking for new members. But there's always room for a truly outstanding player if you are looking for a permanent home with some of the best darn risk players around.

[Georgerx7di]

How do you guys review players to check if they're ok to join your clan or not?

Sorry, I just saw this. I don't know why we have this thread. When we want a player we send him/her a pm. I see you have decent rank, if you come back here and read this, pm me and we could play a few games. Tbh, we're quite full atm, but that changes, and if a player is that good then we'll make an exception obviously.

[trapyoung]

obvi

[maximumbandit]

I have played a balls load of doubles games. The reason for my inexperience in triples and quads is that it's almost impossible to get anywhere playing against random team mates. Cooks and new recruits seldom are big on working together.

I've got a silver medal in doubles, and as I said in the thread where in which I shamelessly tried to whore myself out to a clan (http://www.conquerclub.com/forum/viewto ... 0&t=157510) I'm smelly, eager and pretty fucking funny. (I'm not really as old as I said I was, but old smelly and eager sounded good.)

I type with irritatingly correct grammar and I have an affinity for domination. You want me in your clan... and all you have to do is ask!

[Qwert]

triple and quads are very importan in clan chalenges, expecialy in high ranked clans, because team play go in even much high level then in doubles. You need to try to apply for clans who are new,to train your ability for triple and quads.

[laughingcavalier]

Thanks bandit - PM sent.
We are currently happy with our numbers – in fact some players are saying they aren’t getting enough clan games - so we are only taking in new members in exceptional circumstances.
There is always room for truly outstanding players if they have the mad streak that fits them for jungle life or they have already got intimate with simian friends.